The power and challenge of parenting

Our semester is ending, and we only have a couple more classes left. But nevertheless, here is a conversation about parenting. This week we talked about parenting I was not super excited to talk about parenting this week because I have taken some different classes on parenting, and it is always the same thing. But this week we talked about a different parenting approach. We talked about a parenting approach from Michael Popkin. Popkin’s approach is a complete 180 from what most people use when they are parenting. He looks at the child’s needs instead of what the parent does and how the parent is involved with the children. I think this gets lost when we talk about parenting. If you have ever taken a parenting class, you know the four parenting styles. Authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and indifferent. I do not really love these because it puts parents in a box, and it feels like they just get to live in their designated box and that is your parenting style. I am not a fan of this, but after we talked and learned about the Popkins approach to parenting, I have found a new way of parenting.

Popkin's approach has three columns when we are talking about parenting. The first one is the child’s or teens mistaken approach and the second was child’s needs and the third is the parents’ approach. If there is one thing that you could take away from this blog is the child’s needs. Popkin talks about 5 things that children need. they are contact and belonging, power, protect, withdrawal and challenge. The one thing we need to do to help our children is the power and the challenging aspects of parenting.  

the first need that we talked about in class was contacted. not only physical contact like handshaking and Pats on the back but also emotional contact having long conversations about what they want and what they need is important for them to feel like they belong in this world. it is hard for kids to understand that they have this need they do not have the vocabulary big enough 2 shares with their parents what they need. so that is our job as parents to understand what I need looks like. children need lots of hugs and lots of time with their parents’ handshakes fist bumps and Pats on the back are great for children who are struggling with some contact needs. the next need we talked about was power now if you have ever seen a 3-year-old tried to do whatever they are doing by themselves you will understand the need for power. 3-year-old are the perfect age for understanding that they need power and control from their parents. they want to put their shoes and socks on they want to pick out their shirt they want to have all the power that they can have. we also talked about protection and how we as parents need to protect them but also provide the proper action so that they can protect themselves such as speaking up for themselves and nicely asserting themselves. then we talked about withdrawing and withdrawing some of your power as a parent. letting them make choices and letting them understand the consequences that their actions are taking. and finally, the last aspect of a need his challenge. everybody needs a challenge occasionally we are challenged to read a book, complete an assignment or be the best on the football team we always need a challenge, especially children.

We need to understand what we are looking for and how we can help our children understand a need from want so that they can communicate better when they are old enough and that they can independently get what they need. I really love this approach to parenting just because it is different from anything that I have ever heard of. I think it is easier to understand than the four parenting styles that everybody teaches. this approach is a great way for parents and children to understand the relationship that they can have with one another.